Cathy Menendez

Cathy Menendez

One commitment I’m glad I made was to visit older members of our congregation in nursing homes, as part of the pastoral care team. As a retired nurse, I was comfortable with the setting, and as a long-time member, I was a familiar face.

One woman I visited was in her mid-90’s; she was physically frail and had difficulty engaging in conversation. She had been an active member, so I kept her updated on events at Beacon. I found out she had been a grade-school teacher, so began bringing my 3 year old granddaughter along. My friend smiled and watched intently, as we did puzzles on the rug, read books together, and shared snacks. When my granddaughter started full-time school and my friend was approaching 100 years old, I began to bring a hymnal and sing familiar hymns to her. She would close her eyes, and occasionally nod to indicate which ones she knew and liked best. At our last visit, she sat for almost an hour with her eyes closed while I sang one hymn after another. I thought she might be asleep. When I said goodbye, she opened her eyes and said clearly, “Are you leaving already!”

After a pause, she added. “Thank you for the beautiful hymn-singing.” Now I was the one left speechless.

I visited another member in her 90’s who was on a memory unit. We would have lunch together, then look at old picture directories and reminisce about fun times and old friends. When that was no longer feasible, I began to join her during the music therapy group. I reminded her that we used to sing together in the choir, and now we were having great fun singing the old songs! During the pandemic, we sang together over Zoom. In-person visits have resumed but not group singing, so I bring song sheets and we sing and laugh together in her room. She may not remember names and dates, but she remembers the songs. I can’t wait to sing Happy Birthday when she turns 100 in September.

When I began this work, I hoped I could brighten someone’s day with a friendly presence, and a willingness to listen much and laugh often. But I did not appreciate how much fulfillment and joy it would bring me.