It was a clear night and the observatory was open. The plan was for all 16 youth and 8 adults from Beacon on retreat at Frost Valley camp in New York State to hike up to the observatory, to gaze at the skies, seeing planets in all their glory, with a sense of awe and wonder arising as the distance between our universes fell away. The goal was community building and deepening of connections. It was special because it was one of the few times during the retreat when our group was not offered a choice - the idea was for everyone to go.

Well, you know the saying: the best laid plans often go astray. And so it was with us. I (Tuli), and 11 others, ended up staying behind - 3 adults and 9 youth - due to health and exhaustion. Thanks to an adult guide/youth advisor, a riotous game of Uno ensued with the remaining travelers. Looking around the table of hilarity, I realized that the majority of youth were BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, and People of Color). I began counting: on our two-night retreat of 16 youth, 9 were/are BIPOC; 5 were/are trans. and 3 of the 8 adults were/are also BIPOC. That night, a full 50% of us had stayed behind. 

Why count? In an age when we are told that a fixation on numbers is a characteristic of white supremacy culture, what story do our numbers tell us? I had stayed away from counting because of a recognition of the tokenization that often accompanies counting. That night, counting helped me realize that as we continue on the journey of dismantling white supremacy, as our Board and leaders take on anti-racism, as we live into the 8th principle we have adopted as a congregation, we are constantly being invited to reconsider, readjust, reexamine and reevaluate the systems, plans and structures we have in place. 

Counting helped me stay nimble and alive to the processes that needed to change. Perhaps our BIPOC youth and adults need more choice; perhaps they need more down time; a “one size fits all” approach is inconsistent with anti-racism efforts and here was yet another example. And most importantly, fundamentally, we have to ask our youth and adults of marginalized communities what they want and need in the moment even though they were at the table when we put the plan into place. And then we have to be willing to shift and change. 

And so I ended that night, not disappointed in the least, but hopeful and energized for next year. Our goal had been community building and connection, and that had been achieved, just not in the way we had imagined or planned for.

Beloved, how have you adjusted or reexamined your plans or perspective, particularly around anti-racism efforts? Are you counting? Why? Who is present at your planning table?

As always, we are eager to hear from you as we deepen our connections and build the Beloved Community.

Tuli, Robin, Emilie